Drunk Princess

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Drunk Princess
Drunk Princess.png
Statistics
TypeNPC
AI TypePassive AI
Max Life20,000
Defense 15
KB Resist50%
Drunk Princess map.png
Map Icon
Drunk Princess.png
This is a Town NPC. A House may be required in order for it to appear.

The Drunk Princess is an NPC vendor that will spawn once the following conditions have been met:

  • There is an empty house.
  • A player in the world has Fabsol's Vodka in their inventory.
  • The world is in Hardmode.

When threatened by enemies, she will defend herself with a ray of light.

Items sold[edit | edit source]

Inventory

Item Cost Availability
Grape Beer.png Grape Beer 1 Gold Coin Always available.
Red Wine.png Red Wine 3 Gold Coin Always available.
Moonshine.png Moonshine 5 Gold Coin Always available.
Vodka.png Vodka 5 Gold Coin Always available.
Whiskey.png Whiskey 5 Gold Coin Always available.
Tequila.png Tequila 7 Gold Coin.png 50 Silver Coin.png Always available.
Rum.png Rum 7 Gold Coin.png 50 Silver Coin.png Always available.
Fireball.png Fireball 10 Gold Coin Always available.
Everclear.png Everclear 10 Gold Coin Always available.
Fabsol's Vodka.png Fabsol's Vodka 15 Gold Coin Always available.
Bloody Mary.png Bloody Mary 15 Gold Coin During a Blood Moon
Star Beam Rye.png Star Beam Rye 20 Gold Coin During the night if Astrum Aureus has been defeated.
Screwdriver.png Screwdriver 25 Gold Coin Always available.
Moscow Mule.png Moscow Mule 25 Gold Coin Always available.
White Wine.png White Wine 25 Gold Coin Always available.
Evergreen Gin.png Evergreen Gin 25 Gold Coin Always available.
Cinnamon Roll.png Cinnamon Roll 25 Gold Coin Always available.
Tequila Sunrise.png Tequila Sunrise 30 Gold Coin Always available.
Caribbean Rum.png Caribbean Rum 30 Gold Coin Always available.
Margarita.png Margarita 35 Gold Coin Always available.
Weightless Candle.png Weightless Candle 2 Platinum Coin Always available.
Vigorous Candle.png Vigorous Candle 2 Platinum Coin Always available.
Resilient Candle.png Resilient Candle 2 Platinum Coin Always available.
Spiteful Candle.png Spiteful Candle 2 Platinum Coin Always available.
Odd Mushroom.png Odd Mushroom 3 Platinum Coin Always available.

Names[edit | edit source]

  • The Drunk Princess will always be named Cirrus.

Quotes[edit | edit source]

While homeless:

  • "I could smell my vodka from MILES away!"
  • "Have any spare rooms available? Preferably candle-lit with a hefty supply of booze."

Anytime:

  • "Drink something that turns you into a magical flying unicorn so you can be super gay."
  • "Did anyone ever tell you that large assets cause back pain? Well, they were right."
  • "Hey [name of Patreon donor], [name of Patreon donor], and [name of Patreon donor]! You're all pretty good! ...wait, who are you?"

During the Day:

  • "Like I always say, when you're drunk you can put up with a lot more."
  • "I'm literally balls drunk off my sass right now."
  • "I'm either laughing because I'm drunk or because I've lost my mind. Probably both."
  • "When I'm drunk I'm way happier...at least until the talking worms start to appear."
  • "I should reprogram the whole game while drunk and send it back to the testers."
  • "What a great day, might just drink so much that I get poisoned again."

During the Night:

  • "Now I want to get alcohol, first drinks are on me!"
  • "Here's a challenge...take a drink whenever you take a hit. Oh wait, you'd die."
  • "Well I was planning to light some candles in order to relax...ah well, time to program while drunk."
  • "Yes, everyone knows the mechworm is buggy."
  • "That's west, [Name of Player]. You're fired again."
  • "Are you sure you're 21? ...alright, fine, but don't tell anyone I sold you this."

During a Blood Moon:

  • "Hey! Nice night. I'm gonna make some Bloody Marys. Celery included. Want one?"
  • "More blood for the blood gods!"
  • "Everyone else is so rude tonight. If they don't get over it soon I'll break down their doors and make them!"
  • "Being drunk I have no moral compass atm." (Damages the player for half their health)

During a Party:

  • "You'll always find me at parties where booze is involved...well, you'll always find booze where I'm involved."

During Martian Madness:

  • "Shoot down the space invaders! Sexy time will be postponed if we are invaded by UFOs!"

During the Boss Rush:

  • "We expect you to turn in a perfect performance!"

If any boss is active:

  • "Nothard/10, if I fight bosses I wanna feel like screaming 'OH YES DADDY!' while I die repeatedly."

If Cryogen has been defeated:

  • "God I can't wait to beat on some ice again!"

If Leviathan has been defeated:

  • "Only things I am attracted to are fish women, women, men who look like women, and that's it."

If Polterghast has been defeated:

  • "I saw a ghost down by the old train tracks once flailing wildly at the lily pads, those were the days."

If The Devourer of Gods has been defeated:

  • "I hear it's amazing when the famous purple-stuffed worm out in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hara-kiri rock. I need scissors! 61!"

If Tavernkeep is present:

  • "Tell [Name of Tavernkeep] to stop calling me. He’s not wanted."
  • "My booze will always be better than [Name of Tavernkeep]'s and nobody can convince me otherwise."

If Stylist is present:

  • "You still can't stop me from selling alcohol and trying to move in with [Name of Stylist]"
  • "I love it when [Name of Stylist]'s hands get sticky from all that...wax."
  • "[Name of Stylist] works wonders for my hair...among other things."

If Dryad is present:

  • "[Name of Dryad] is cool too but she'd outlive me."

If Archmage is present:

  • "I never realized how well-endowed [Name of Archmage] was. It had to be the largest icicle I had ever seen."

If Moon Lord has been defeated:

  • "I'll always be watching."
  • "Why did one creature need that many tentacles? ...actually, don't answer that."
  • "There's chemicals in the water...and it's turning the frogs gay!" (If it is Raining)

If the player has the Fab debuff:

  • "Oh yeah now you're drinking the good stuff! Do you like it? I created the recipe by mixing fairy dust, crystals, and other magical crap."

If the player is riding the Alicorn mount:

  • "...so, you're riding me huh? That's not weird at all."
  • "Are you coming on to me?"
  • "If I was a magical horse in this reality I'd be out in space swirling cocktails as I watch space worms battle for my enjoyment."

If the player has the Chibii Devourer equipped:

  • "Is that a toy? Looks like something I'd carry around if I was 5 years old."

If the player has the Siren's Heart equipped:

  • "Nice...scales...did it get hot in here?"

When selecting Death Count:

  • "You have failed [Number of Deaths] time(s)."

Notes[edit | edit source]

  • The Discount Card will not reduce the prices of any items sold by the Drunk Princess.
  • The price of all items sold by The Drunk Princess are increased.
    • The cost of all drinks are increased by 50%
    • The cost of all candles are increased by 300%
    • The cost of odd mushroom is increased by 200%
  • The displayed sell value of all items sold by the Drunk Princess are false due to her increased sell prices.
    • The sell price of all drinks are decreased from 20% of the buy price to 13.34%
    • The sell price of all candles are decreased from 20% of the buy price to 5%
    • The sell price of odd mushroom are decreased from 20% of the buy price to 6.67%

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • The Drunk Princess is a self-insertion of the owner of the mod, also known as Cirrus, Fabsol or MountainDrew, who has been known to get drunk a lot on several occasions.
  • The Drunk Princess has only one possible name, sharing this trait with Santa Claus, the Sea King, and the Archmage.
  • One of her quotes mentions the names of users who have donated to the mod on Patreon.
  • The quote about reprogramming the whole game while drunk is a fourth-wall breaking quote, implying the creator of the mod getting drunk and sending a broken mod to the beta testers of the mod.
  • The quote about the buggy mechworm is a reference to the bugs caused by Staff of the Mechworm being frequently reported by the community.
  • The quote about blood for the blood gods is a reference to the game Warhammer 40,000.
  • The quote about chemicals in the water is a reference to the American radio show host and conspiracy theorist Alex Jones.
  • The quote about it being west and the player getting fired is a reference to Spongebob Squarepants.
  • The quote about the Hara-kiri rock and scissors as well as space invaders reference to the lines spoken by the Colonel in Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty.
  • The Drunk Princess is most likely a lesbian, as evidenced by her attraction to the Stylist and her post-Leviathan quote, or bisexual, considering her implied sexual encounter with the Archmage.
  • The "Talking Worms" quote is a reference to The Devourer of Gods, as during the boss fight, it repeatedly talks to the player.
  • The Death Count does not factor in deaths due to Armageddon's instant kill effect while a boss is alive.
  • In the mod's source files, the Drunk Princess is referred to as 'FAP'.